Wait, is it February already?

The name of the store has been obscured so I don't bring it into disrepute.

I bet you’re thinking this is YET ANOTHER post about resolutions – well, no it isn’t. Last Friday I ambled into work and was told to expect a parade of folks coming in that afternoon for the annual Spring Hiring Fair. I was to welcome them graciously to the store and ask them to take a seat in the Seasonal Department. I agreed and then started to frown. There was something familiar about the Annual Spring Hiring Fair, now what was it? Oh yes, that was where I came to get MY job….last year.

I very nearly had to go and take a seat in the Seasonal Department myself. A year. A whole year. I’ve been standing by the door and saying “Hello.” to complete strangers for a year.* This was not the plan.

Well, I say that, but what exactly WAS the plan? I know that the playwriting job was not sufficient for the mortgage people, so me having a ‘proper’ job with payslips and all made a big difference there, even if the wages didn’t. I know that it was important for me to feel that I was DOING something to help out with the financial situation, and there didn’t seem to be any reliable ways to increase my writing income. Mrs Dim had the notion that it would be good for me to get out and meet people, and yes, I can now say I have some friends at work, people who I’m glad to see and interested to talk to. So that’s all good then.

That hasn’t stopped me from thrashing my brain trying to figure out the brilliant play, movie or TV idea that will launch me out of regular work and back into full-time writing. I’ve been more consistent with my blogging, as Kristen Lamb recommends, improving my web platform to support my status. It’s a growing business still, but it grows slowly, as we add titles to the TLC canon, as Steve adds new corporate jobs to our repertoire, as we look at other revenue streams. Growth is good, and if I can’t increase the rate of growth, then I’m going to have to accept that I’ll still be wearing my apron and smiling for strangers for some time to come yet. But part of me worries that I’ll be stood there when the Christmas carols are playing again, that I’ll be shivering as the February winds gust through the door with the customers, that I’m envious of the March sunshine outside as I count the minutes until the shift ends. That doesn’t sound like job satisfaction to me.

So do me a favour: If you read this, leave a comment to encourage me. Like “STOP WHINING TRASLER!”

 

 

 

*Ok, after a year, not all of them are complete strangers. And sometimes I say “Good morning!” or “Good afternoon!” and occasionally “Huh? Oh, uh…Fnh..urgh…” when they catch me by surprise. It’s not a precise science.

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7 responses to “Wait, is it February already?

  1. You won’t hear me say, “STOP WHINING TRASLER.” Mostly because I fear reciprocation, and I’m in a fragile state at the moment. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    But I will say this: We all do what we do to get to our true passion. While greeting customers is certainly not your passion, it gives you time to “thrash around” that incredible next offering.

    When I was on the dance team in high school, we used to perform in parades with the marching band, and we had to learn how to “mark time.”

    You’re marking time. I’m marking time. But eventually, we’ll be marching. And the crowds better get out of the way when we do!

    Best of luck! ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Thanks Mikalee! I need the support, because I’m worried Kristen’s going to follow the link to her blog and tell me off for not following her advice closely enough. Baby steps, baby steps….. Read what she says about eating mushrooms, though, it’s a classic.

  3. So glad to see “we are not alone.” I too am making changes in my writing progress and consider them big ones, in a baby step kind of way, if that makes sense. I’m still trying to find that balance of what makes sense financially and how to feed my passion for writing. I hear ya! We’re in interview mode too and I hear myself asking all these applicants “What are your goals in the next year?” and being a little too timid sometimes to answer that myself. Breathe in, breathe out… Thanks for sharing your post!

    • I think I already told the story about the interview where they asked me where I saw myself in five year’s time, and I said I wanted to be a novellist. They were interviewing me for a job in the photocopy room… I got the job though. Finished the novel too. That’s one of the “Not published” ones….

  4. git it written already! Books don’t write themselves you know!

    ๐Ÿ˜‰

  5. STOP WHINING!

    I’m kidding, I’m kidding! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Don’t give up hope. Keep your chin up. Every day is a new day…. And all that encouraging stuff! Your blogging buddies believe in yooooooou! ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. I don’t know you, but I know you’ve got this! YES YOU CAN! You are a winner. An awesome winner!

    How was that?

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