I spent five weeks visiting the hypnotherapist (see the previous post for a full explanation). She was great, taking me seriously, talking me through the various issues I had around fruit and vegetables and exploring my attitudes and expectations on a variety of things. Each session would end, of course, with hypnosis, and I can’t tell you much about that because, duh, I was in a trance*. But the hypnosis seemed to be more about reinforcing the issues we had been discussing, and bolstering my resolve to try new things. We established that I don’t have to like EVERYTHING, I can still not enjoy things that don’t taste nice. But the options here are fairly stark – eat a better diet, or die early. I don’t want to die early. For one thing, I haven’t finished the bloody dalek.
I’ve always known my diet was unhealthy, and that heart attacks were the probable outcome. But when you’re in your teens, dying at forty seems impossibly far away.
In the months since the sessions ended, I’ve refused less. Mrs Dim has made fewer concessions to my pickiness, and we’ve found some things that work well. But I’m still reluctant, because it’s still me CHOOSING to add things I don’t like to food I would otherwise enjoy. Salad does not taste nice. No, not even with dressing on it. I have eaten some fruit, and I should eat more, but picking up raw fruit and taking a healthy bite is….unlikely, to say the least. Give me more soup, cook those apples into a pie, drown those bananas in custard, and then we’ll talk.
I haven’t been back to the doctor’s to check my blood, so I don’t know where I stand in the pre-diabetic stakes anymore. What I do know is that there’s nothing left to cut out, and I’m not adding very much in. The hypnosis was not what I’d hoped it would be, a chance to sidestep my natural (?) dislike of certain foods. More of a driving force is provided by the thought of how much money we spent on those sessions. It would buy a lot of bananas.
*Was I? Most of the hypnosis stuff I’ve listened to explains that you’re NOT going to be unconscious, but I don’t remember the actual hypnosis sessions. I know I woke myself with my snores at least once.